Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Pure frustration


It has now been about 3 months, and I am still looking for the job that will take me through the next 10-15 years till I retire. Have not found anything as of yet. I feel like I am some kind of failure at times seeing as how I can not find a job to help sustain my family. I took a test for the 2009 census a couple of weeks ago and scored what I thought was fairly well, then my new 18 year old daughter took the same test last week and aced it, wow do I feel dumb. I guess at my age we look at things a little different. With the econemy the way it is, I really do not know if day light is up ahead. I keep sinking deeper and deeper into myself withdrawling from others finding myself even more alone. The thought of not having a real full time job eats at me every day. Waking up with no where to go, lack of responsibility, plainly no drive any more. I have got skills and am willing to work most any job, just can not hook one. In utmost desperation I am going to start flipping burgers again at a fast food resturant. With God and the love of my family I know I will get through this but it is not easy and I can feel for those that are going through the same trials that I am. "Don't give up", I keep telling myself, "God has got a plan for me I just don't know what it is yet."

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